All children naturally long for relationship with their father. Nothing can fill the place in their hearts that a father is supposed to fill. When a father is gone, whether through death, divorce or abandonment, their absence has a lifelong effect on their child.
My husband was raised by a single mom. His parents divorced when he was ten years old, leaving his mother to raise three children alone. His father chose to move thousands of miles away. Throughout most of his life, my husband was lucky if he saw his father once a year. His father moved on with his life and began a new family. His financial support was non-existent, right along with the emotional support and encouragement for his children.
Most statistics would have predicted that my husband would have repeated his father’s mistakes with his own family. Studies show that breaking the cycle of abuse, neglect or abandonment is near impossible. Thankfully, that is not the case with my husband.
Dan made a decision as a young man that he would never put his children through what he experienced as a child. With determination and God’s help, he purposed to become a great husband and father. He watched other men with their families. He listened to pastors and teachers impart wisdom on being a great husband and father. He read books on marriage and parenting. He became the father he never had.
My husband and I don’t have great wealth to leave to our children. The legacy Dan leaves is one of integrity and faithfulness. He is respected and loved by family and many friends. He has a good reputation in the community. He is a man of faith and principle.
On Father’s Day I am thankful for my husband and the father of my children. He may not be perfect, but he is perfect for us.
“A hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove…but the world may be a better place because I was important in the life of a child.” Forest E. Witcraft
What kind of legacy are you leaving your children?
This post is not meant to cast blame or guilt on anyone who has suffered divorce or abandonment. It is meant as encouragement to parents to focus on leaving your children a legacy of values and integrity.